Hope grows together

5 Things to Reflect on During Quarantine

Posted in Blog | Posted by: | Tagged: | Leave a reply

From one special needs parent to another – here’s 5 reminders to reflect on during quarantine: 

  1. Accept that your day will not go as planned.   The quicker you’re able to swallow that dose of truth the better it will be for you, your child(ren), and anyone else who happens to encounter your path throughout the day.  Throw your hands up to the sky and let it go because it is totally OK if things go out of order.  

You wouldn’t be a good parent if everything was in its place.  That is what an early intervention therapist said to me after I had apologized about the crumbs on my carpet and the unfolded piles of laundry on the couch.   She said it would raise concern if she walked in and saw a spotless home. That changed my perspective on trying to obtain unattainable goals.  

We’re not equipped with teacher assistants and aids in our home so let’s not be so hard on ourselves.  Messy mishaps and a hectic home is the norm; it’s inevitable really. Perfection is not real – most of us know that, right?  

  1. Let them in control (so they think).  There are two key phrases that my sons respond well to.  It’s a bargaining tool used to achieve stuff on my to-do list while they maintain an activity.  

Less tantrums will result.  (And, you’re welcome in advance)  

  1. Embrace your natural instincts. Trust what you know is right.  

Do what is comfortable within your own self followed by doing what you know keeps your family at a sane level.  Steer clear of what you’re not able to do and view everything that you are able to do.  

Encourage your self-esteem because you deserve to feel emotionally and mentally supported.  Look into a mirror and stare at yourself (just give it a try!) and affirm that you love you.  Say “I love you insert your name here.” 

It may seem silly, but the truth is a lot of what you do goes without notice and thanks so sometimes if you want something done right you just have to do it yourself.  Self-love without guilt. Easier said than done, but it’s a survival technique that’s free and life saving. 

  1. Avoid toxic comparisons. Social media sku’s the level of reality and is a culprit to a toxic state of mind so don’t be ashamed if you need to separate yourself from certain people or groups.  

Yes, it’s human nature to compare your child(ren) to the next, however, it is the furthest thing from what is healthy.  So unplug. Disconnect from anyone or anything that makes you feel agitated or fear or worry.  

Take as many time-outs as you need.  After all we need a lot of strength to raise our children in this demanding society.  

  1. Live for today, and today only – Remind yourself frequently that yesterday is gone,  tomorrow isn’t promised and today is all we have.  

Our society is demanding.  The pressure families face allow zero time to recoup or process things within a reasonable manner.  Yet, somehow, we keep moving on. 

When the worries and fears of tomorrow creep into the brain, repeat that phrase to yourself.   The weight of the world will slightly lift up and off your shoulders allowing you to live with some sense of ease.

Written by:  Mother to Girius (age 9) and Crosby (age 8) 

Leave a Reply


connect with other families sharing our autism journey. Join our discussion groups and stay up to date with current research